Escape To Danger 2.0 No.8

Earlier today I happened to read a piece of modern commentary that was at great pains to remind less worldly fans that Doctor Who seasons from the 1960s weren't micromanaged to the ridiculous degree that seasons of the rebooted series are today. (No story arcs, no character development, no plot pointers scattered hither and yon, and certainly no - insert teeth-grinding sound effect here - "emotional climax").

 

Similarly, it's so easy these days to be tempted to view stories like "The Three Doctors" by modern expectations of what constitutes an anniversary knees-up. But when you actually look at things, Doctor Who makes a wonderfully characteristic inconsistent stab at it.

 

 

And to keep you in suspense, we'll get back to talking about the first notable anniversary (the ten year one) later when we've had a look at some notable others.

 

First out of the hat are the celebrations to mark the 100th broadcast story. Taking "Mission To the Unknown" into their count (as indeed they should), the production team initially went to all the trouble of writing an extra scene into "The Stones of Blood" where the Doctor is presented with a cake to celebrate his 751st birthday. Party-pooper Graham Williams deemed the scene too silly, and the it was never shot (but the crew got to eat the cake, apparantly).

 

While no great loss to the world, it would perhaps have been a nice touch had anybody realised at the time that the broadcast of Part Four of "The Stones of Blood" was to be a mere five days before the 15th Anniversary of the series. John-Nathan Turner would have sold his grandmother for a coincidence like that...

 

 

Which brings us to the next milestone, the 20th Anniversary. And what a corker that was. After the almost-afterthought misfire of selling Season 20 as featuring "an element from the Doctor's past" in every story (which is kind of ok if you want to count the Black Guardian three times out of an eventual six), we got "The Five Doctors", the Longleat weekend, and, erm... the "Doctor Who: A Celebration" book by Peter Haining.

 

Joking aside, "The Five Doctors" was at the time of broadcast seen to be such a success that it was temporarily cool to be a fan again, even in the confines of a provincial English public school where such things were normally viewed as juvenile and (as we said in the 80s) gay.

 

But more about "The Five Doctors", Longleat and Peter Haining when we look at Serial 5K itself...

 

 

Never one to fall foul of the mistakes of his predecessors, J-NT decided that the 150th broadcast story was worth a bit of publicity, and so the otherwise unremarkable "Dragonfire" got a minor bit of coverage in the press. Unfortunately, he jumped the gun somewhat when he cheated and counted "The Trial of a Time Lord" as four separate stories. If he'd only waited, the 150th broadcast show would have been "Silver Nemesis", which was ironically touted as the 25th Anniversary show. (It featured Courtney Pine, the Queen (cough), and the plot of "Remembrance of the Daleks").

The 30th and 40th Anniversaries saw the series not actually on the air, but the 30th gave us a repeat season, loads of VHS releases and "Dimensions In Time" (so it was therefore a good thing, despite what many might say). And the 40th had a nice logo...

And the 50th... well, yer modern timey-wimey stuff that at least brought Paul McCann back in from the cold (albeit obliquely) and managed very well thank you without the perpetually disgruntled Eccleston.

So... what's all this got to do with "The Three Doctors"? The question of perspective, that's what.

From the sometimes underwhelming on-screen evidence, it's difficult to remember what a big deal Serial RRR actually was. Look... all three Doctors (almost) together at last! A threat the (then) omnipotent Time Lords were babbing their pants about! Patrick-fucking-Troughton being interviewed on Pebble Mill At One!

I genuinely like "The Three Doctors". But while the concept and script are amazing, it looks as if all the budget was blown on securing Troughton and Hartnell for the party, with nothing left in the pot for what's happening on screen. Lennie Mayne was probably not the best choice of director for the gig, Katy Manning has to perform Jo Grant as a hideous moron, and the Brigadier's character also hits an all-time low. (At one point he has a little huffy fit where he has to go and have a private moment, and let's not forget the "hilarity" of the Cromer stuff).

But... perspective, I keep telling myself. Before "The Five Doctors" raised the bar so much (and "The Two Doctors" tried to deflate the pomp and circumstance), "The Three Doctors" was a special in every sense of the word. (And Troughton is so fucking amazing it almost hurts). 

As I said the first time around... what's a bridge for, eh? 

Publicity Shots From Hell No.119

Awww, Tom. And I thought you'd forgotten...

 

Yes, let's all raise a moderate glass as the All-New Monoid One Security Kitchen III (previously known elsewhere as "Mrs Farrel's C.S.O. Kitchen") celebrates its seventh year in this format of... well, nothing much.

 

If I didn't spend all my time either working, drinking a bit too much or cleaning up after two lazy humans and two messy dogs, things could well have risen above the tedious and mundane every once in a while.

 

Anyway, here's to many more years of painfully laboured content, of little or no interest to anybody other than myself...

Publicity Shots From Hell No.100

Who'd have thought it... 100 posts (and counting) of mainly Doctor Who oddities and wearisome sarcastic comment?

Let's face it, this thread is an easy way to maintain a blog with bare minimum effort, and a handy method to disguise the fact that I'm generally too busy or lazy to write anything of actual interest or substance...

So, here's a big Roy Castle and Jennie Linden style pat on the back for myself.

Now, back to pretending that I'm not writing this during a coffee break at work...

Escape To Danger No.20

Reading back a few of these pages the other day, I note my recent tendency to launch a new entry by making a tenuous link to current happenings or previous remarks.

 

So let's start this one in a predictable fashion by talking about anniversaries...

 

 

I am informed that this month marks the tenth anniversary of myself and Ms Monoid either being together, or initiating communications, or some such thing. I am always amused by the fact that she miscounted and attempted to launch the festivities last October, reminding me of the fact that the first episode of "The Three Doctors" aired before the arrival of the anniversary year it was intended to celebrate.

 

"The Three Doctors" is one of those stories that I have incredibly fond memories of, yet it always comes across as vaguely anti-climactic. And I don't really know why.

 

 

Hmmm... the Steam of Singularity, there. Which may be a fitting metaphor for why Serial RRR is forever doomed to be merely Fucking Brilliant, as opposed to Totally Fucking Brilliant?

 

 

Whatever you might think, it's not worth falling out over...

 

Personally, I am tempted by the theory that it is victim to the polar opposite of Average Novelisation Syndrome, and the fact that a hardback of the Terrance Dicks adaptation had been on the shelves of our local library for some time before I sat slack-jawed and awestruck, watching the thing for real during "The Five Faces of Doctor Who" repeat season.

 

 

While I am perennially grateful for growing up during the period that I did, I wasn't  too enamoured of the revisionism of the Target range that lumbered me with the Jeff Cummins cover of this story when I eventually got round to buying my own copies of the novels. (The one where he's used a publicity still of Salamander for reference material. I preferred Chris Achilleos' "homage" to Jack Kirby, although I didn't realise it for what it was at the time).

 

 

The novel continues to stick in the memory because it bothered to give a "reason" why Omega decided to live somewhere that looked like a quarry rather than somewhere more conventionally appealing. (Too much effort to mentally maintain lush vegetation, apparently. Probably why his TV set looked so rubbish too...)

 

 

And let's not forget the above shot, that still causes Target synaesthesia problems and makes me automatically think of "The Web of Fear"...

 

 

And whilst I'm banging on in my usual manner, I might as well get in this instalment's reference to the second series Weetabix cards, and how amazing I thought the Gell Guards looked. (They still do look amazing. They just don't sound quite so amazing).

 

 

"Kidnapped By Gell Guards - Miss Next Go"... 

 

But no matter how they sound, any monster that can create a cliffhanger of UNIT HQ disappearing into a black hole is cool by me.

 

 

Is Pertwee stood on a box? I can't believe Troughton was such a short-arse as he looks in that shot. Maybe being the incumbent Doctor, Pertwee had it written into his contract that he had to be taller than everybody else.

 

 

And speaking of short-arses, there's the Brigadier with another of Bob and Dave's Comedy Bumpkins...

 

 

And finally, the villain of the piece. Another great bit of design that is truly memorable. Stephen Thorne doesn't half give the role some clout, and there are some suitably good scenery-chewing moments. (And, leading on from the last entry, the other great moment in the series when the villain is unmasked and there's a chilling lack of anything to see...)  

 

 

Nowadays, I suppose multi-Doctor stories don't raise as much as an eyebrow, but back in the 1970's, this was really cutting edge stuff. Maybe it's very reluctance to play up the less subtle and more gimmicky elements that the 20th Anniversary special "The Five Doctors" had in spades works after all.

 

So what initially appears to be a weakness of "The Three Doctors" turns out to be a hidden strength; the steadfast refusal to chuck everything and the kitchen sink at a threat that is not only universal, but also as mad as a box of frogs.

 

 

And contrary to fan myth, none of it was filmed in William Hartnell's shed.

 

"Now, what's a bridge for, eh?"